When us dump a narcissist or also when a narcissist dumps us, one of the points that they carry out to do themselves feel better is embark on a smear campaign. To run a smear campaign somehow offers the narcissist justification regarding why we were never worthy of their visibility to start with. By constantly talking smack around the discarded partner…by acquiring “the word out” about how horrible his or her ex is…the narcissist feeling pumped up and vindicated about however the relationship occurred to end. Now, if the narcissist and also his ex share mutual friends or take place to be co-workers or have youngsters together, the project can obviously reason a an excellent deal of stress and anxiety for the victim partner. If this companion happens to be you and also you’re analysis this article, i’m going to describe a foolproof method for handling this problem and also the equipment is really an extremely simple. Girlfriend basically have to say nothing at all….not a single thing…and think me, there will be a totality lot of strength in her silence.
You are watching: How to beat a smear campaign
When someone is talking shit around us come others, our an initial – and natural – reaction is to want to protect ourselves. In numerous situations, the course, defending ourselves is the right thing come do yet when the human being talking smack around us is our narcissistic ex, ns have uncovered that quiet (on our part) is the absolute and also only means to beat this human being at his or her own game. In fact, when our narcissist’s mouth is flapping, our silence functions to our advantage in SO many ways because that the an easy reason the it soon exposes the narc for the asshole that he or she yes, really is.
The fact is that we don’t have to defend ourselves as soon as the human talking smack is a creep past words. We just don’t.
It’s a truth that a narcissist will certainly talk bad about us to anyone – his family, our family, ours kids, shared friends, co-workers – and there’s no a whole lot we can do around it. The smear campaign is one of the earliest narcissistic tip in the book. Sure, we can run approximately behind that trying to execute damage regulate or we can embark top top a smear project of ours own yet we’re handling a narcissist here and also he will use our defensive reaction together proof that us are precisely as the describes. If friend think about it, this is what we’ve been handling throughout the entire relationship! I’m here to tell girlfriend that, no issue when a smear campaign begins or how awful it is, all we ever before have to execute is it is in quiet, be nice, and also be normal and the narcissist will easily end up looking prefer an idiot. Yes, that is difficult to continue to be quiet however the results (and rewards) room amazing and they come quickly. This strategy works, by the way, even with narcissists that space well got within the community. It constantly works.
Think about it objectively. Imagine the you’re part of a group and one couple in the team has a really tumultuous relationship. Even if it is they space together or not there is constantly drama and within the group, anyone is annoyed. When the couple finally splits for great and each starts coming about separately, you an alert that that (or she) walk NOTHING however talk shit around the ex for hours on end while the other fifty percent shows up saying nothing at all. In fact, she doesn’t speak – or also want to talk – about the break-up. Instead, she just mingles through the group. In ~ first, it’s awkward because the ex, who has actually said some awful things, is like the elephant in the room…but everyone soon gets over that. As time passes, which ex-member of that couple is going come look much more favorable come all? The answer is obvious.
No matter what the says, no issue how bad he insists the she is, the reality that she maintains silence, never even uttering his name, instantly casts doubt on everything he says. She silence create plausible deniability in she favor and, again, it constantly works!
Is it hurtful to know that the narcissist never has actually a nice point to say around us behind our backs? Of food it is. It deserve to be devastating. I recognize this because my ex to be a backstabber for 13-years whether we were damaged up or not. Did I ever feel unpleasant socializing with friends understanding what he could be saying as soon as I’m not there? that course i did! But the truth is this: world really don’t desire to hear around it and they will WELCOME her silence. Us imagine the everyone hangs top top a narcissist’s word prefer we do however this simply isn’t true.
This strategy is foolproof…and why?
Because in the end, the reality really go prevail and our silence allows it to happen.
Just questioning a narcissist – the understand of the silent treatment – how powerful a silence can be. The final break-up just wake up to it is in the one time whereby the narcissist can’t seem to keep a shred of quiet at all yet this time it works to her advantage.
See more: Sms Backups: How To Backup Text Messages To Computer, Saving Text Messages To Computer
So, salary no mind come what her narcissistic ex is saying about you or how awful the lies occur to be. Every you have to do is remain quiet and act normal. This strategy additionally works when co-parenting, an interpretation that when the narcissistic ex is talking smack about you to the kids, you simply don’t reciprocate. The children will figure out soon enough who the villain parental really is and they will execute it on their own. With friends, family, and co-workers, the silent defense is foolproof. Think me…the switch-over in the mental of all who listen will certainly be swift. Ultimately – and maybe because that the an initial time due to the fact that you’ve recognized this person – friend will have beaten the narcissist in ~ his very own fucking game and also you will have done that without saying a single word.